If wishes were horses...
I'd be knee deep in horse shit this very second.
I wish I had an extra two hours in bed.
I wish I didn't have to meet my mother later on to day for lunch.
I wish the 'thing' I'm working on right now would somehow mysteriously do itself- but brilliantly.
I wish when people say, 'I'll call you with that information' they follow through.
I wish when people then say 'Right sorry, I'll get back to you in five' they actually do so.
I wish the Harpy would stop timing her comings and goings with my post weekend trips to the bottle bank.
I wish I somehow never gained a single pound and stayed toned and fit from eating lashings of buttered toast and marmalade.
I wish I had a natural love for running like Finn, instead of it sometimes being a real struggle to haul my ass out the door.
I wish the paramour had never told me about the horse spunk swallowing scene in Jackass 2.
I wish people who eat fish would stop calling themselves Vegetarians.
I wish the little Goth Kid would give me back the boot she borrowed from me.
I wish she didn't think Paris Hilton is funny.
I wish I knew where the hell my other dangly earring went.
I wish Catherine Zeta Jones woud stop wearing hideous smock styled dresses made from sofa material.