The pillow angel.
This story disturbs me, on the one hand I understand the logic behind the parent's decision, on the other I question the moral and ethical reasons used to mutilate a child.
I have no doubt they love her and I read their blog...but I don't know. Like I said, I am disturbed.
I have no doubt they love her and I read their blog...but I don't know. Like I said, I am disturbed.
posted by fatmammycat at 11:34 p.m.
26 Comments:
Bit disturbed by the idea of it being more convenient to mover her around. Still, tough choices, and I feel very lucky not to have to make one.
God me too. I wouldn't envy any parent that decision.
They should trade her in for a pit bull.
Twenty! Stop that!
I just think this is wrong. Well intentioned but wrong, wrong,wrong.
What course of action could they have followed Tattiehead? They consulted with doctors and seem to have considered the options. They clearly want what is best for their child, are we flinching because we consider this a immoral action to preform on a child? What if that child is not just a child, as in this case, but a severly handicapped child with no hope of ever becoming a normal healthy adult. What are they robbing her of exactly?
I'm not really arguing, I'm trying to get my head around it.
I think the parents most definitely made the right and brave decision in this case. Ashley who has and will have the emotional intelligence of a 3 month old for the entirety of her life, will be saved the discomfort and pain of menstruation, her smaller size will ensure she will have less chance of developing bed sores. Her breasts have also been removed as she was genetically inclined to have large ones. She will now never run the risk of getting breast cancer and won't have to deal with the cumbersome nature of larger breasts. The critics say her human dignity has been breached. Unfortunately I would say dignity is one of the last considerations in a lot of care homes where she would have probably ended up as her parents got older and she got bigger, had they not taken these measures.At least now she can (probably)be looked after by her parents for the rest of their lives. The moral outrage against the parents has really sickened me, you just know that most of the critics have never been in anything resembling their situation. It is I suppose not too surprising that disabled rights groups would be up in arms about it. They see Ashley as someone that perhaps needs their voice to speak up for her because she cannot. I thik they are misguided though.
I'm not religious, nor caught up in the "moral" perspective either. I just feel deep down this is wrong but I can't at this time vocalise why. Like you I'm struggling to get my head round it. I've not yet read their blog because I don't want to jump in without clarifying my my thoughts and lord knows I don't want to add to the parents anguish.
I do know this has affected me strongly but until I can clarify why, I'm not able or willing to comment other than gut feeling.
I feel for Ashley AND her parents. I still feel this is wrong.
I thought it was a sick joke when I heard it on my way to work yesterday. I understand that caring for a severely disabled person is unbelievably difficult, but mutilation just smacks of eugenics to me. Scary, scary, scary.
That said, I'm sure the parents didn't do it to mutilate their child. I'm more disturbed by the ethics board that allowed it to happen.
the parents made a strategic gaffe. rather than justifying each procedure with logic, they should have invoked a whacky religious belief and hollered about discrimination if anyone protested.
brenda, i'm not sure whether i like or am repelled by your breast argument, but it's intriguing.
happy friday, cat!
Not sure what to make of that one myself, I'm assuming the parents have their childs best interests at heart. Why go public though? Film rights? Leaked, so they're getting their story out first?
Horrible circumstances for anyone. The little girl looks happy in the pictures so you have to guess they're doing a good job.
Happy Friday Ducky, hope you're feeling better.
I believe a concern of her parents was that when fully grown their daughter might attract sexual attention if her large breasts were allowed to develop fully, they have also removed her utetus to prevent her ever having a period, and she is on hormone medicine to prevent puberty. I'm not sure that initially they wanted to go public, I believe two doctors who were concerned contacted the ethics board in the earlier days and that is how the story became public.
I believe a concern of her parents was that when fully grown their daughter might attract sexual attention if her large breasts were allowed to develop fully
Now seriously, given the fact she can't move her fucking head, where exactly is she going to be to attract these sexual attentions?
"Hey Joe, see that girl there lying on the bar?"
"Yeah."
"She's got really big boobs. And she's drooling and making gurgling noises."
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAWT"
Load of bollocks.
What's a load of bollocks?
The bit about cutting her boobs off because she might attract sexual attention.
Whatever their motives that just sounds wrong to me. However you look at it it's medical mutilation and what I was suggesting was that the chances of her attracting any sexual attention in her lifetime is practically zero.
I understand you disquiet, but let me point out waht was written by her father in their blog...
1. Very large breasts run in their family, and they would only cause Ashley discomfort.
2. The growth attenuation is done with estrogen therapy, and that would have caused her breasts to develop and grow large, had her breast buds not been removed.
3. Breast bud removal is simple and added no risk; it was done at the same time as the other operations. Her nipples remain intact and she looks normal.
4. She has no need for adult breasts. She has the mind of a 3 month old baby, and she will never have the capacity to consent to sex or reproduction. She will never give birth and will never breastfeed.
5. Less risk of breast cancer.
Before they did this, they had to run it by a 40-member ethics committee. That committee was convinced that this was in Ashley’s best interests, to preserve her quality of life, not just for the parents’ convenience.
You just wonder how much of what they're doing is for her care or for their benefit.
They are connected. Surely if this proceedure mean they can care for their daughter to the best of thier ability, it also follows that their child will receive their utmost care and attention.
At the end of the days this is a girl who cannot move, cannot raise her head, stays in the exact position she is left in and has such a low mental capacity that even the parents themselves are unsure if she can even recognise them. If this proceedure leaves this particular child more comfortable in the long run then it is the correct one.
It just leaves me very uneasy. Why not just have euthanise her? That's the next step, isn't it?
Don't be sick, Twenty...or think I am, but seriously...it would take a much more tenderhearted person than I not to even entertain the idea, at least for a SECOND, of putting a pillow over this kid's head.
I know I'll get some angry comments about saying that. Not that I would ever, COULD ever, do something like that to a human being...but the thought... yeah, it would occur to me. It would save everyone a lot of trouble...but I'm so used to putting animals down when their quality of life is shite, and I've never had a kid, so it's hard to imagine.
Still, I think the parents did the right thing. Disturbing, yes, but less disturbing than the possibility of a hired caregiver raping this girl, or even having to change her menstrual pads or tampons every few hours when she hits puberty.
I don't know...
I agree with Andraste, she should be killed.
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