Goes? Goes bloody where or whatever.

'And then she goes-'
'Said.'
'And then I go, "well you should say that or whatever". You know?'
'And then she comes back and goes. "Did you see her?" And I goes,-'
'Said.'
'Yeah, whatever, anyway, I go she's a stupid Bitch. She's owes us a tenner. So we go upstairs and
Ish goes'-
'Said'
'Yeah, whatever anyway, Ish SAID, 'there she is!".'

And on it went. I listened, not on purpose you understand, but with anxiety and a mild thought to throw myself from my own moving car. The previous snippet was only part of an incredibly long winded account of a key ring of all things, told to me by Gothy of all people in my car yesterday, of all days.
After every 'goes' I automatically corrected her with 'said', every time I did this she replied, 'yeah, whatever, anyway' and thus the story took almost the entire car journey, and believe me, it wasn't that interesting a story to begin with. Dragged out with, 'Goes' 'said', yeah whatever, anyway' it went on for an almost unprecedented twenty-five minutes.
The moral of the story? Do not give teenagers lifts unless they are mute or listening to ipods.