Friday, October 20, 2006

The emperor's new clothes.

I was gonna write something witty and possibly mildly sarcastic about the fact that...
FASHION designers have revealed their latest marketing innovation for the world's skinny women - a size smaller than zero.

This summer, British clothes stores began stocking the waif size 4, following the rise of the equivalent size in the US, size 0. Now America is once again leading the way with a new size - 00 - for waists the circumference of a child's football.

Banana Republic, which is owned by Gap, is already advertising 00 clothes on its website.

Another company, Nicole Miller, is planning to introduce "sub-zero". It said customers were complaining they had to take in the existing size 0 clothes.

Alison Hodge, a spokeswoman for Nicole Miller, said: "We've introduced this new size for naturally petite women, not for models who have dieted themselves down to a dangerously low height-to-weight ratio."

But then I thought, really, why bother? Can you imagine..
'I'm a size zero.'
'I'm less than zero, I'm double zero.'
'Yeah, well I'm fucking invisible.'
'Oh my god, that's totally cool.'
Who are the dumb people who buy into this kind of shit? No really, who are they and how can they exist. I mean who tells 'em to breathe and blink and stuff?
I"m going out for a drink now.
Tomorrow, the paramour has informed me we are to attend some 'family' do. I am bereft. Isn't it bad enough I have my own family? Now I'm expected to mingle with his too. I tried the 'but they're your family.' And he used, 'yes and you're my finaceƩ' on me. Damn it.
I really am going out for a velly long drink. Have a good weekend y'all.


Anonymous eva said...

So what are you getting at...? You feel like a "size zero" for being the "fiancee"?

Or? Two separate things in this post?

Sorry if I got mixed messages. Maybe it's the alcohol clouding my mind at this moment.

But for the record: I HATE - with a passion! - the whole fashion industry for introducing this "new" zero and even sub-zero (puke) concept. I lived in Italy for nearly 3 years and there I became "anti-looks" because I could, and cannot stand their f*cking vanity! I met so many "empty minds" (that is in my mind) - people who lived only for comparing their f*cking tans - that I got fed up. Beyond belief. After that I feel like dressing in a bin bag for the rest of my life.

Size 100 if so be it.

Give me a drug addict, alcie, obese, mano depressive lunatic instead - any time, any day.

1:17 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Ye-ar, I see what you mean. I was giving out bout one thing and because it was making me cross I naturally bobbled off into something that was causing me equal parts crank.
I like clothes, but for Gawds sake, I exist, therefore I am a size. How can you be a size 0? HOw can you be less that 0? What the hell is it all about? It makes me want to eat toast with lashing of butter and raspeberry jam, it does.
I am also considering pulling a sicky. This seems stupid, but I really don't want to go to a gathering of assorted relatives. I would rather not.
And now I've to go pull on a pair of trainers and take CG's never tiring dog out. Oh wah!

10:07 a.m.  
Blogger John Mc said...

At my stag party a very drunk women gave me two pieces of excellent advice. She informed me that she was married and that the key to success was:
1. Get a dog before you have a baby, if you can handle a dog you probably can handle a baby, and if not you can at least give it away.

2. Do your absolute best to make friends with your spouse's family. They will be a constant throughout your live and misery will be only outcome if you dan't put up with them or at least try. I never took the first piece of advice, but the second becomes infinitely more important once you have kids. Then your inlaws become a much bigger part of your life whether you like it or not.

8:07 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Sound advice, giving away babies seems perfectly reasonable to me.
Tell me, did she have anything to say oon the subject of monsterous hangovers?
I was delighted to find the paramour's extended family are all booze hounds and any number of his mad aunties could drink a sailer under the table.
I think I finally broke CG's dog too. I took him out for two hours yesterday and when we were driving back across town he lay down in the back of the car. When I delightedly told the paramour he said, 'Don't you find it a little odd that you are in competition with a dog?'
To which I replied. 'Have we met?'

10:23 a.m.  
Blogger Belinda Cockbox said...

I like me wimmen with a bit of meat on them. No mistake. A size 00 Ha i'd mistake it for a cotton bud.

and we all know what that means

1:16 p.m.  
Blogger Kim Ayres said...

Size 00? This is starting to sound like the old Hornby railway sets...

4:23 p.m.  
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