Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Mike Tyson.


Iron Mike is on the road again. The road crash that is Mike Tyson is now working for charity. Naturally in the spirit of things he's offering to beat women up too.

"The the 40-year-old former heavyweight champ promised an entertaining show Friday night when he launches the "Mike Tyson's World Tour" in Youngstown.

At a news conference at an Italian restaurant, Tyson said he would likely go just four rounds and that future stops on the tour might include bouts with women, possibly professional boxer Ann Wolfe.

Wolfe, from Waco, Texas, is 21-1 with 15 knockouts.

"She's such a prominent, dominant woman in the boxing field," Tyson said.

When asked if he was joking about fighting women, Tyson said, "I'm very serious."

Russ Young, a promoter for Wolfe, said such a bout will never happen.

"That's the first we've heard of it," Young said. "No state would sanction that. She would be outweighed by 60 to 70 pounds. Ann would never entertain the idea."

Of course she wouldn't, she is a serious professional not a circus sideshow freak. Any woman who knows anything about real fighting -I"m not talking Buffy wannabeeesss here- would never set foot in a ring with Tyson- or any other professional male fighter.
So there you have it folks. Not content with raping, threatening to eat babies and chewing the ear off boxers, warm hearted Mike would also like to fight women...in the name of charidee. I wonder what's next? What about kangeroos? I hear them Joeys can really pack a punch. Wouldn't that be just so darn cute, the Joey in his red satin shorts, Iron Mike in his, duking it out? For charidee?
Say it with me now, ahhhhh.
I'm off to kickboxing, where I will naturally be doing a spot of head bashing myself. It won't be against a behemoth twice my size and it won't be for charidee, but hey, I'm selfish like that.

8 Comments:

Blogger Dr Maroon said...

Sew a golfball into his neck.
Oh no that was the last one.
sorry.

12:07 p.m.  
Blogger Kim Ayres said...

I didn't realise Mikey was only 4 months older than me. Wow, to think what I could have achieved with my life if only I'd decided to become a thug and rapist for a living instead...

4:22 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

On the ball I see Docky, splendid.
Oh yes kim you too could have it all, the tour, the head tattoo, the gory, the reputation. But you threw it all away, and for what, for the love of a good woman and gorgeous kids. How do you sleep with yourself knowing what ya coulda had?

7:04 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

And probably a whole SLEW of popcorn.

11:07 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You could put a 'roo in a wig and those heels and chortle as it kicked the heart out of Tyson.
There was a TV news helicopter crew based next to us for a time and they had a pet kangaroo complete with gloves.It would batter fuck out of the two lads every now and again.
Joey Vs.Tyson?
My money is on the Aussie.

7:40 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Mine too, vicious bastards theose big red ones.

10:19 a.m.  
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