Save the ginger!
Huzzah! It has taken 21 days, but finally I have fulfilled another of my resolutions. 7:30, chumlies, 7:30 I was up and squinting at the coffee press. That exactly half an hour before eight. Before!
Oh I know there are some of you sitting in work since eight going, 'so what? I do that everyday.' But to you I say ' all right, keep your knickers on. I don't.' ( Yesterday I didn't even wake up until 11:55. Admittedly I may have been in a mild coma, but still)
Now, on to matter most grave and serious.
Did you know that to be a ginger you must have a recessive gene? Did you? And that gingerism is under threat? I read that this morning (early) and almost Ashley Cole-ed (ran off the road) in shock and deep terror.
"The first online dating service exclusively for people with ginger hair has been launched in an attempt to save their fiery locks.
Redhedd.com could prove vital to the future of gingers, who make up about two per cent of the world's population.
Celebrities including Hollywood star Nicole Kidman and DJ Chris Evans keep ginger in the spotlight.
But, because they have a recessive gene, some fear it could die out within 100 years.
'The mission is to save redheads,' said website founder Steve Warrington.
'To do this we have to mingle them to concentrate the two genes that make red hair,' he added.
The site features polls and quizzes created by red-headed users and blogs on the day-to-day lives of gingers around the world.
Users can also buy mugs and T-shirts proclaiming the joy of being ginger. The US site could be a hit in Scotland, where about 13 per cent of the population – the highest proportion in the world – have ginger hair.
Charles Kennedy, the former Liberal Democrat leader who also sports a crop of red hair, said: 'The fightback starts here.
'Against the more gloomy predictions, I have taken encouragement from the fact that, although I am married to a dark-haired woman, my two-year-old son is defiantly red-headed.'
Could you imagine a world with no ginger? Would it even be worth living at all? No carrot-top? No Nicole Kidman, no Lohan, no Chris Evans, no doc Morris from ER, no Shaun White, no me.
What? I never told you I was a ginger? Well I was. I was ginger right up until three, then fate decided I had enough problems with having the mother I had and dimpled knees, so it changed my hair to a auburn, then a russet and now it is...well a darkish brown with a lot of red through it, lighter towards the end. Mongrel hair. Odd coloured according to the paramour, who can hardly talk with that beard of his. (Also I had straight hair when I was young, now it is not straight, not even a bit)
One of the most beautiful girls I ever met had bright red hair, ringlets and ringlets of bright red hair. I coveted it. I'd probably have cheerfully scalped her had it been legal to go about scalping folk. Of course she also had alabaster skin and amazing blue eyes.
So huzzah I say, thank god somebody has set up a website to save the ginger. I mean fuck it, they have breeding programmes for pandas don't they, the lazy leaf eating shits. Oooh, don't let the pandas die out. yeah right, screw pandas, if they're too lazy to mate that's their hard luck. We should be setting up- breeding programmes for gingers, especially curly gingers.
Also, did you know that this is supposed to be the most depressive day of the year? Debts, failed resolutions, cold weather, no christmas cheer left, doom gloom.
Pah! Poppycock. It's Monday, the start of a week, the beginning, a clean slate. Who could find that depressing?
I might go for a run. I might have toast. Maybe I'll juice something. I don't know what I might do. It's so early. So very early. But I won't be gloomy, oh no. For what? What good does that ever do? It's a new day, a new dawn (really). Had I a horse I might go galloping over the horizon, with a gilded lasso, hunting nervy red heads. But only for scientific purposes you understand.
Labels: Is that Brenda Power?