Friday, December 12, 2008

Boyfriends can be problematic.

Top of ginger day to you!

( patio foundation--->)

Whenever I think that I'm a pretty liberal sort- you know, with the exception of woo, but by and large- every now and then something crops up which makes me rethink my weakly held opinion and also makes me take the polishing rag to the blunderbuss.
My eldest sister was here last night, telling us about her friend who has a daughter who is about to turn eighteen. Naturally this means said child spends a considerable amount of her weekend in some place called Eamon Dorans, some rock pup where the average age is-from what I gather- about nineteen and everyone wear black. The girl, a nice sensible young 'un who looks like she comes from a home where her clothes are washed regularly, has begun to 'date' another fellow. The photo I have thoughtfully provided is not him, but from what I can gather is a close approximation of said chap.
Let's be totally honest here. If this arrived at your house to take your daughter to the debs/prom/cinema/anywhere, wouldn't you just start subscribing to the Daily Mail? Even if you knew deep down somewhere that he was probably a nice chap and all that? I mean, what is the correct response to that type of mental assault?
My sister thought moving country seemed appropriate. The Paramour thought digging a very large hole in the back garden and planting said crusty as a patio base might be the way to go.
My response, apart from laughing, is to swaddle myself in eighties music, safe in the knowledge that I wore MORE makeup then Siouxsie and had higher hair. Teenagers will be teenagers and I already read the Mail.



Blogger Conan Drumm said...

If one of mine brought home a fella that reads the Daily Mail I'd have to take extreme measures.

10:37 a.m.  
Anonymous sheepworrier said...

Well, daughterless as I (hopefully) am, my reaction would be to 1st wipe away the tears of laughter and then try and remember all the stupid shite I pulled as a teenybopper and get a bit of perspective. I went through the grunge phase and I'm pretty sure I wasn't exactly the 1st choice on parents lists from outward appearance, but I was a decent enough lad and always respectful. I think it's too easy for parents to forget their teenage years.

10:38 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Heh Conan, its a sneaky fungus to be sure.
Indeed Sheepie, hide in music, it's the only sane way. Plus if he DID have one of those nose rings, attaching a small easily reachable chain to it-like with a bull- would surely guarantee good behaviour.
Heh, Grunge, how many plaid shirts did you own?

10:43 a.m.  
Anonymous Babs said...

I brought someone who looked sort of like that home when I was 17, he was a piercer by trade aswell, but there was no issue really with my parents as they are very open minded about pretty much everything. I then began to look like that thanks to his hands, I had in total 8 piercings on my face alone and lots in my ears as well, got tattooed (but I still love them all) and was all in all a bit mental, now I wear pearl earrings and am a lady (apparently), I grew out of it slowly but surely and then last year I removed my last piercing that was visible, my Dad then told me I was beautiful with or without them, aw!
Looking back now I know I must have looked like a total sap but it was all experimentation and learning and growing up and I am glad I did it all.

10:48 a.m.  
Anonymous sheepworrier said...

"Heh, Grunge, how many plaid shirts did you own?"
Dont even joke! I think there's still about 15 hanging up in the spare room in my parents house... they're probably still too big for me. The nirvana and pearl jam tshirts took pride of place tho.

You just dont understand!

*storms off to bedroom to listen to in utero*

10:52 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

* Jeremy's Broken* laughs at Sheepie.

Babs! Aw, your daddy sounds adorable. When you take out big plate earrings liek the ones in the photo, surely you're left wiht rather large gaping holes?

10:57 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

hmm, so many letters typed backwards today. Stroke perhaps.

11:03 a.m.  
Blogger Rowan Manahan said...

As a father of two girls (9 and 11), I regularly wake up with a start in the middle of the night and a disquieting sense of foreboding about the shape of boyfriends to come ...

Great post FMC and soooo cool on 'Cities in Dust' - long time no hear.

11:37 a.m.  
Anonymous sheepworrier said...

My deepest sympathies Rowan. You may get practising sitting on the front porch in a rocking chair, nursing a shotgun now, just so you have it perfected in 4 years...

11:59 a.m.  
Blogger Kim Ayres said...

To be honest, he couldn't be worse than one already chosen who just looked normal...

12:17 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

The foreboding, heed it.

* Lights the Candle of Sympathy for Ronan, passes the blunderbuss of respectful teachings.*

Kim, that's true, who amongst has not fallen foul of the pretty box of hate filed horror. Having said that, sometimes if it looks like a duck and quaks like a duck it's a duck.

Still laughing at plaid shirts, refuses to ever admit ever owning one. Or a leath biker jacket. THE SHAME!

12:26 p.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

4 years, Sheepo? The gun'll be needed well before that.

I have a scythe, for the weeds.

12:30 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Sycthe? Amateur. What you need is a Roscoe and a ready built pit filled with lye which you can cover over with planks of wood that somehow mysteriously have lawn turf attached to them.

12:35 p.m.  
Anonymous sheepworrier said...

I didn't want to alarm the poor fella, Conan. he's not getting enough sleep as it is...

12:40 p.m.  
Anonymous Babs said...

FMC yes he is rather adorable. The way all Daddies should be really!
I never had the big plates only 5mm plugs and they close to the same as a normal earring hole fairly quickly, but yes the large ones leave horrible holes, which is why I never got them. The guy who pierced my tongue had a stretching plug in his tongue, told me it would never close up, it was pretty rank really...his one, not mine now.
People who have met me since I have removed them have seen photos of me with them in and say they suit me, I never went OTT like this lad, and all of mine were teeny little ball bars as well, so they were cute I suppose, in a wierd way.
I also had the Nirvana t-shirts and did a lot of storming off in my day, but hey, at least I wasn't mad into Boyzone like the rest of the wans in my class in school...

1:15 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

And praise marmalade for THAT!

1:20 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Sheepie, have you heard? From today's Examiner, "Rockers Pearl Jam are re-releasing their debut album 'Ten' next year, 18 years after the band helped pioneer the grunge music scene."

Release the plaid!

2:04 p.m.  
Anonymous sheepworrier said...

*dons plaid shirt, slouches, mumbles something about futility of life and how unfair everything is*


2:28 p.m.  
Blogger Medbh said...

I was routinely called ugly back when I had my own rebellion and I was no where near as extreme as that dude in the picture.
I think I'd be more worried if I had a daughter and she turned up with some clean-cut Mormon looking date.
Siouxie's voice rocks in that one.

3:45 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

ER, I would be freaked out beyond measure if any daughter of mine arrived home with a man claiming magical underwear. Fo' sho'!
Anyway, off to kickboxing I go, have a lovely weekend everyone.

3:53 p.m.  
Anonymous sheepworrier said...

Have a good un folks - im off to contend with the great unwashed masses in my attempt to get a decent seat in the pub.

*warms up the attitude adjusters*

4:38 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This was so so so funny. I'm in work and had to cover up my laughing with a cough.

Oh sweet mirth...

5:49 p.m.  
Blogger The Hangar Queen said...

I'll see your Siouxsie and raise you a Shakespeare's Sister.

Wasn't Siobhan just splendid? Did my Grunge thing in Seattle and my leather biker jacket in NYC.I won't tell you what I did in San Francisco but it involved a few odd piercings.

9:05 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

She's fab AND mad as a box of badgers.
*Waves at lovelydisco is dicombobulated at thoughts of work*

10:20 a.m.  
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