Monday, July 31, 2006


While I was sleeping and working and going out and buying shoes and so on a whole boom has gone on-relatively unnoticed by me-in the property market of Ireland. I mean of course I knew of it-Christ, it is all some people have spoken of for years- but I just never paid too much attention to it.
But the BOI ( bank of Ireland) said yesterday that the average price of a house in Ireland now is 400,000 Euros! Rising to 530,000 Euros in Dublin!!! It seems now that even a two up two down in Crumlin can cost this astronomical price.
I know this because in my haste to find another house before the paramour buys that death trap I have decided on direct action. My action consists of dealing with David, a very slick property type chappie online and over the phone, see how direct I am?
'You'll definitely like this one.' He emailed me yesterday.
The words, 'you'll like it' are starting to make me feel very nervous, every time someone says it I definitely don't like what I'm about to see.
Click click. Up pops a tiny terraced house with a white alumimium door.
Okay, I'm not going to disparage the house, it was very clean and well maintained, but it had a tiny sitting room, an even tinier kitchen and two wardobes that David swore blind were bedrooms. And a downstairs bathroom, just one of those. The garden was bare, grass and two hedges. There was no patio and a crumbly looking shed lay against the back wall. There was a lots of carpet and patterned wallpaper.
'She needs a bit of a face lift but basically it's your perfect investment home.' Slick David mailed.
I mailed back. 'I don't want an investment home. I want a house where I can have an office and actual bedrooms, I would really like a dressing room too, and two bathrooms, at least.Look David I wouldn't even get my desk into that house.' (I'm not joking, the desk is a monster, it took two men hours to get it in here)
David lost none of his gloss. 'Well, we can get you exactly what you want, but you're talking serious money.'
'How much money?'
He quoted a figure. When I came round, I read it again.

Erm...perhaps I should go back and have a look at that rambling death trap again.


Anonymous Hairy Bowsey said...

Myself and the partner wept openly when we heard that announcement. The bank man saying it was so matter of fact that it was clear he had no idea what it was doing to the chest cavities of desperate non home owners. When I heard this morning that AIB have announced another round of stupendous profits I shouted 'fuck off' at the radio, shocking the Spanish student we've taken in to help pay our exorbitant rent.

10:39 a.m.  
Blogger beezer said...

In Lucan (where i reside) you are looking at 460 - 500K for a 4-bedroomed gaff. A similar domicile to ours is going for 475K at the moment. Lucan may be a bit out of town but you get used to it (after about a year in my case), are guaranteed a nice big house with a decent garden, and a bit of peace and quiet (apart from the banshee cat last night looking for its bit of tail). West is where its at! Really.

11:53 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Welcome HB. Yes it's absolutely shocking, I've spent/wasted half the morning scrolling through and Sherry Fitzgeralds and gibbering quietly to myself. Who the hell can afford prices like this?
I have friends that bought a massive house recently but they're both working like dogs and are maxed to the hilt with credit cards and repayments and personal loans and God knows what else. And they're utterly miserable and terrified about interest rates going up even by a percentage. I'm not sure I want to be that twitchy.
Lucan's a bit far out beezer. Mind you the house the Paramour likes is far out, but south and friends of mine bought a house just a mile from Mulhuddert a few years ago when there was nothing but building sites around them. Now there's a hugh shopping centre. decent bar, a Lidl and all sorts, a virtual town has sprung up.
Eeeek, I might have to buy a stupid car again.

12:04 p.m.  
Blogger beezer said...

I understand FMC, I was once a committed city girl myself. To be honest if I had the spondulicks, I would be upping sticks (pardon the pun) and hightailing it back to the city centre but I ain't going any where untill I make my fortune! Good luck with the house hunt. I have friends who have moved to Cork because Dublin is so difficult to buy in. The closed bidding situation is a disgrace! They should have proper auctions.

12:22 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Yeah, I heard there is all sorts of nonsense with 'envelope' bids and all sorts of gazumphing. For bloody shame.

12:33 p.m.  
Anonymous Sinéad said...

I live in Crumlin (that's 'gangland Crumlin' to any RTE reporter) and I really like it. The houses are reasonably priced and solid as bejaysus as they're old 1930s/40s corpo houses.
Town is handy, there are lots of buses and it's under a tenner to get a cab home from town on a night out.
Are you looking anywhere in particular?

Two sets of couples I know are both trying to buy and reckon a mortgage broker is the way to go.

2:44 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Oh I don't know Sinéad. Lesson park? Ranelagh? Portobello? See, not likely to happen, not without some lottery style input. I like Harold's cross and Templeogue/Knocklyon too. But we're wandering further and further afield now.
Realistically I'd like a decent sized house with front and rear garden, side gate, room for an office, wood floor, original fireplaces and an excellent kitchen.I'd also like to be able to pay for it withou selling my organs. There is that too much to ask?! Oh and all within a stone's throw from the Green.

By the by, Country gay lives in Crumlin and he's got a great garden and the house, although small is bloomin' gorgeous. Cost the dickens to to up though, but worth every penny.

3:28 p.m.  
Blogger SafeTinspector said...

My Step-dad bought a nice ranch style (large single floor with basement) in the late 1970's for about 20,000$ US (probably about 18,000EU, I'd say)

In 1995 I bought a tiny bingalow (small first floor, smaller peaked-roof second floor on a crawl space--no basement, pity) for $65,000.

In 2002 (or was it 2003?) I sold that Bungalow for $94,000.

I bought a small-ish colonial (two small stories plus a basement. Approximately 1.5x the size of the bingalow) at that time for $178,000.
I'll be paying on that bastard for thirty years.

This is in Detroit, which is considered a recession economy for the last five years.

3:29 p.m.  
Blogger Kim Ayres said...

I guess we'll be living in rented accommodation forever.

6:49 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I'm guessing Scotland is much more reasonable than here Kim.You can probably get a decent home for a decent price there, no?

8:16 p.m.  
Blogger Tommy said...

I learned recently by my nice bank that my morgage will go up by a minimum of €150 a month,depending on which option I take it could go up by as much as €300,the fuckers.As much as it may pain you FMC, the way to go for value is places like Crumlin or Ballyfermot upper(lower are 2 bed, upper 3)huge rear gardens,plenty of room for change,usually sitting room, kitchen,some have a parlour, under 300K for a terraced,350 for a semi(you could build a house in the side entrance of some of those)or you could move to Detroit, $178000, you would buy a kennel in dublin for that.

1:45 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

150 minimum? Bloody hell Tommy, ouch.

9:30 a.m.  
Anonymous Cate said...

It's too stressful to think about and virtually impossible for someone like myself in their late twenties to even contemplate trying to cover a mortgage in this city. I wouldn't even make enough to break even.

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