Wednesday, December 06, 2006


Maybe men won't get this, but perhaps some of the ladies will.
All three of us fatcat siblings are champion criers. We like crying and can do so at the drop of a hat. This gift precludes my mother because to cry one needs tear ducts and a bit of a heart.
I am not convinced she has either.
Anyhoo, as dedicated criers we think nothing about it. We cry about happy things (passing exams/having children/finding shoe sales) sad things (loss of fathers/beloved pets) annoying things (losing keys/forgetting mobiles phones/ being constantly reminded that time ticks on and our wombs won't last forever) sore things (catching thumbs in door/ twisting ankles in highheels) cute french bulldog puppies(that would be me) Credit card bills (Etheline) children flushing jewellery down the loo (eldest sister).
Basically we cry about pretty much everything. Not for ages, just microwave bursts that soothe us. This used to annoy the fanny off our mother who would throw her hands up and go 'Oh great, here come the waterworks!' We would then cry at her heartlessness and so on until she wandered off in disgust. Then we would cry in delight at our victory over the great lilac beast.
Really, we see no shame in it. We can, of course, not cry when it suits us. And not cry very well. But that's a whole other thing entirely.
I myself an an ambi-crier. I can cry over two separate things at the one time, totally independent of each other. Etheline can do that too, my eldest sister says she can but we have our doubts.
My point?
Well, sometimes we are inclined to forget that some people don't have this gift. And might be...oh say, perturbed by it.

Last night while the paramour sat in a pub somewhere watching the Arsenal, Etheline-who still has not left her womanly hipped fiance- and I cracked open a bottle of wine and sat down to watch Terms of Endearment, a sad film and one of our favourites. Cue much tears and sniffling. Especially that scene where Shirley comes down the hall to the nurses station screaming about her daughter being in pain and why won't anyone help her...
So any way, at the end of the film, there we were, curled on the sofa, hugging various cats and sniffing and talking about shoes in Brown Thomas and what to get our mother for Christmas when the paramour arrived home, a bottle of plonk under his arm.
He opened up the sitting room door, stepped in, took one look at us and froze.
'Hello.' I blubbered.
'Hello.' Etheline sobbed.
The paramour looked stricken. He took a deep breath, put the bottle down and said. 'Okay, what's happened? What it is?'
Etheline and I exchanged watery glances. 'What?'
'What's going on, you might as well tell me out straight.'
'Why are you two crying.'
'Oh, Terms of Endearment.'
I can't say he looked relieved, he managed irked however and a bit pale. He said. 'Jesus Christ' under his breath and 'I'm going for a shower.'
Then he looked at us again and shook his head. I think he might have said 'Jesus christ' once more.
'What's his problem?' Etheline said wiping steaks of mascara from her cheek.
'Dunno.' I said, reaching for a tissue to blow my nose. 'I wish people would stop wearing open toed shoes with tights.'
'Oh that reminds me, I saw-'

Poor old sausage, he's really going to have to toughen up.


Anonymous Babs said...

I am the same, exactly. I cry all the time, today, I had tears for the girl in Cork who was murdered "on the spur" of the moment by her boyfriend, I was in the canteen in work, people think I am mental in here. Also on Tueday, after a horrendous interview where one the interviewers belittled me throughout the entire thing, I cried big fat hot tears all the way home. The females in my family are all the same. I find women who don't ever cry kind of cold and emotionless. The trick is (unless its just a casual weep) to not let the person who made me cry see it happening, that way they will never know that they have won.

2:13 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, I just saw Finn's post. Happy Birthday!!!

2:29 p.m.  
Blogger SheBah said...

Babs - I think the trick is to let the person who made you cry see you cry - sometimes people should be made to realise the effect their wounding words have - it may even have elicited an apology. So what if you are showing you are not made of stone. Fuck them.

2:30 p.m.  
Blogger SheBah said...

To-day your birthday, FMC! Happy birthday, virtual glasses of champagne all round.

2:31 p.m.  
Anonymous Babs said...

Shebah, I don't do it, working in a male dominated environment I have gained a toughened exterior, I cried once when I was straight out of college, never again. I only try to not cry in work, outside in "normal" life, I am a blubbering sap!!

2:53 p.m.  
Anonymous Babs said...

Shebah, I don't do it, working in a male dominated environment I have gained a toughened exterior, I cried once when I was straight out of college, never again. I only try to not cry in work, outside in "normal" life, I am a blubbering sap!!

2:53 p.m.  
Blogger Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

Is it really your birthday? Well, have a happy one, darlin'! I shall toast you this evening with something yummy.

This will work out well because it will lend some purpose to the heavy drinking I will be doing on account of my mother arriving on Friday for 5, read it 5 sodding weeks. (She invited herself).

Have a lovely day, sweetpea.

2:56 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wah... waah...waaah... waahCwaaah... waah...waaah, ahuh... waah...waaah... waah...waaah, ahuh...'s your b b b sniff... waah...waaah... waah...waaah, ahuh... waah...waaah... waah...waaah, ahuh... waah...waaah... waah...waaah, ahuh... ahem...

3:03 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Are you kidding me? Crying during Terms of Endearment is like crying while chopping onions. It's absolutely irresistible. I'm more concerned about my own predilection for crying in that last scene of Forrest fucking Gump, all two times I was made to watch it at my parents'. The shame is almost too great to bear.

And Happy Birthday!

4:01 p.m.  
Anonymous Bonnie said...

As a young teen my mother came home to find me bawling my eyes out and was quite alarmed and asked what was wrong. "Gloria and Mike are moving out!" I had been watching the episode of All In The Family where they move out and I was a crying mess. To this day my mother utters a "Jesus Christ" when I tell that story.....

Happy Birthday! Hoist a few for me, please, in your honor.

4:52 p.m.  
Anonymous eva said...

Happy Birthday FMC!!!! I hope you have a great evening!

And being able to cry on cue is a gift. I grew up playing with boys and I refused to cry in front of them, no matter what happened. I wanted to show them that I was as tough - or actually tougher - than them. To this day I can only cry when I'm alone, except in extreme circumstances.

5:09 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was told recently that tears are a gift, a healing gift, and that people who can cry (let it out) are lucky. I never thought of it like that, but it's a good one to remember when the tears flow unexpectedly. I go through stages myself of tough exterior meets tough interior, never crying; and crying over every blessed thing then for another few weeks / months.
Women are fabulous, battling mighty hormones night and day and trying to compete with the hormoneless males.... not that crying is all hormone related, but I think they have an impact, do you?
Lá breithe faoi mhaise dhuit, FMC!!!!

12:04 a.m.  
Anonymous Babs said...

Last night I cried, loads: we got our Christmas tree, basically, I was starving, usually I eat dinner by 6 at the latest, it was 7.40 and I still hadn't eaten, low blood sugar, tears, my roomies think I am mental, the tree didn't fit the stand so we had to get an axe at it..yes an actual axe. It was a very emotional time. And Eva, that's why I never cry on front of boys as well, apart from a select few! Lucky them!!

8:38 a.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

after the rain comes sunshine

that's just nature

it's not good to have a cloud infront of the sun

better to let it fall as rain

god bless ya


7:37 a.m.  
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