Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Crocs are lethal (allegedly) and ugly (surely)

From the Telegraph.

"Crocs, the fashionable plastic clogs, could be banned from all hospitals because it is feared they interfere with life-saving medical equipment.
The soles on the shoes are thought to generate static electricity which is strong enough to knock out respirators and machines in operating theatres.

The comfy footwear has become hugely popular over the past few years and are a particular favourite with nurses as they enable them to endure long hours on their feet.

But they are now expected to be banned from the Sheffield Teaching Hospitals NHS trust in South Yorks, and other hospitals are set to follow suit.

The move comes after a hospital in Sweden reported malfunctions on respirators and other machines which they blamed on static electricity generated by the shoe.

The Blekinge hospital, near Karlskrona in the south of the country, said that at least three equipment failures had occurred in recent months, caused by staff wearing crocs.

Although no-one was injured, one hospital spokesman Bjorn Lofqvist warned that they were strong enough to cause a “cloud of lightening”.

Clouds of lightening! Wow, and I thought they were just absolutely disgusting and the ugliest thing I've ever seen and why in the name of god do people-sensible people- wear them with socks and why would they leave the house in them and for the love of Mike Murphy if Uggs-which make people look like confused camels- weren't enough, rubber boating shoes in vile colours are surely the dizzy limit?
Crocs, I'm against them! And Uggs too. Vile.

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Anonymous Shebah said...

Crocs are a joke played on gullible women by devious gay designers. Imagine the laughs they’ve had over the years:

Gay Designer 1: Let’s see if we can make them wear a skirt like a mushroom – after all, we’ve been feeding them bullshit for years!

G.D.2: Yes, we can call it the puffball – do you think they’ll go for it? Har.

G.D.1: What about seriously ugly boots that make them walk like Llamas?

G.D.2: Ugg! You’re such a bitch! I know, let’s call them Uggs!

GD1: What about some hideous coloured plastic shoes that make them walk like old crocks?

GD2: Oh, you are awful.

10:45 a.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

I am informed by Drummlet minor that I should be agin Uggs and Dubes, and that the highest echelon of footwear is New Rock.

I am not agin Crocs but do not own a pair. I believe they are the synthetic 21st century equivalent of Birkenstocks and therefore beloved of peta supporting ladies who enjoy gardening and the company of ladies, exclusively.

10:48 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Oh COnan, if only that were true, but it's not, they're spreading like a colourful fungus. VILE>
Shebah! Hahah, you're so spot on. Have you seem Autumns new tights? Buttons! On tights! Buttons on three part tights! Haven't we suffered enough.

10:53 a.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

Wait a minute, buttons on tights... I saw a picture of them... me likee! But not with Crocs.

11:27 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I"m glad you likey, doubtless you'll be thrilled silly when your beautiful Kohl wearing Conanette skips out the door in them to the next school dance.

11:30 a.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

Stripey thigh-highs (not matching) and too cool for dancing - ie so far so good.

12:13 p.m.  
Blogger Dr. James McInerney said...

I was wearing my crocs last night milking the cows and they completely fecked up the entire milking machine. We had butter coming out of one end of the machine and cheese coming out of the other end.

Fecking crocs.

1:00 p.m.  
Blogger Gerry said...

Crocs rock, they're a great invention

2:10 p.m.  
Blogger P1P said...

My friend had some and tried to tell me they were ok for men to wear too. When I had stopped laughing and realised she was serious she tried to convince me by saying that the guy in the shop had a pair.

I think they looked good on her but no man should willingly don them unless it's to test the theory that you can kill people in hospital.

Even during the experiment you'd feel like a twat.

2:30 p.m.  
Blogger Medbh said...

In Canada I see more men wearing crocs than women.
May I add a third footwear trend to the list of abominations?
Flip-flops. They are loud and ugly and make the wearer's feet so dirty. Ick.

2:40 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Gerry Gerry Gerry, dude, NO, say it with me now, NO. Ming, they're totally ming. They're so minging they need a whole knew classifcation of mIng, like Mega ming, or mong. ion't do it Gerry, don't do it. There might be photos taken and then what happens when you come to your senses?

4:00 p.m.  
Blogger Gerry said...

photos of crocs can hardly come back to me worse than some of my other fashion disasters. or some of the nights on the booze. anyway, they're comfortable. very comfortable. you should try them ;)

4:17 p.m.  
Anonymous Shebah said...

Gerry, next come the elasticated waistbands, tartan slippers and the teasmade, then it's downhill all the way!

4:29 p.m.  
Anonymous Sinéad said...

I'll only wear them when I've got a colostomy bag and my own nappies.

Whether it's wise or not, I have jumped back on board HMS Blog. Eek.

4:38 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Listen to Shebah, she's right! You'll start complain' about stairs and wouldn't it be more practical to move to a bungalow. Where will it end Gerry? Where?
Sinéad! Welcome back, I trust you, mister you, and the new addition are bothy dandy as lions, I'll be right over.

4:42 p.m.  
Anonymous laughykate said...

I soooooooooo agree. The first time I saw them I thought they were an evil designer at work (like shebah said)...and proceeded to share my opinions ('they have got to be the most butt ugly footwear ever invented by mankind barring nothing..blah de blah blah blah blah')... unfortunately I went on to discover the person i shared this information with owned about 13 pairs.

10:23 p.m.  
Blogger Gerry said...

I'm afraid my fashion sense died a horrible death years ago. I only stop just short of wearing these
mind you, they do look comfortable

7:49 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Hahha, laughykate, hate that. Cringe cringe.
Gerry, oh Gerry, fleece crocs? I mean, good lord (they do look comfortable though, comfortable and hideous)

8:27 a.m.  
Blogger Gerry said...

Admitting they look comfortable FMC? That's the first step on a very slippery slope. I say as I button up my cardigan and slip on my cruggs

9:48 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

'Aieeee', she said fleeing back upstairs to seek out her highest heels.

9:59 a.m.  
Blogger Rusticissimus maximus said...

I was nearly knocked over on a petrol station forecourt over the weekend by an ultra sporty 07 D reg BMW (we hates D reg cars down here, it means there's a 'holiday home' somewhere back west that's headed for use for the weekend). But what really pissed me off was when the guy got out of the car in a pair of short shorts and blue crocs.

I didn't know what they were called and had never seen them before then, but hated them on sight. They are the most ridiculous things I have ever seen, thank you for such a helpful and civic minded post FMC!

3:30 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...


4:12 p.m.  
Blogger Little Red said...

LOOKS AREN'T EVERYTHING. I can almost guarantee that you folks who are so contemptuous of crocs (and Uggs for that matter) have never had them on your feet - if you did, you wouldnt care how stupid they look. They feel heavenly. I've spent the last 15 years torturing my tootsis with stillettos and 4" wedges and pointy toed boots, and yes they are gorgeous, but I've done all that and nowdays, whenever possible, I'm in my crocs or Uggs. What is so wrong with feeling good? Does it really matter that much to you to be fashionable that you insist we all must torture ourselves every minute? I ask you for a little tolerance please, for the humble, indistructable, cheap, soft, waterproof, cool and ergonomicly perfect creation, the croc.

5:09 p.m.  
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