Monday, October 13, 2008

Pick and Choose Policing.

I was strolling through town with the paramour yesterday. Busy busy as Sundays are wont to be. At the top of Grafton Street unfunny comedian David McSavage held sway with a microphone, insulting people willy nilly and playing 'Twist and Shout' on an acoustic guitar- both blunderbussing offenses in my view. Under every cash machine some variation of hobo sat, demanding money from people, Chuggers (charity muggers) were out in force, there was didgeridoo playing dude and a man with a puppet dancing to Amy Winehouse outside HMV, oh and the occasional 'statue' was taking a much deserved fag break.
On Wicklow street we watched two Ban Gardas bravely tackle a skinny teenager who was busking. 'Move it along' the one wearing make-up Lily Savage wouldn't have worn in daylight said, 'you can't sing here.'
We stood outside the Louis Vuitton luggage display window (drool). I looked at the travel cases. The paramour watched the guards, his green/brown eyes narrowing.
'Amazing that they pick on some harmless kid singing Wonderwall, but they leave that utter bollocks at the top of the street alone.' He said as the young lad packed up his guitar and slouched up the road, his Converse slapping dejectedly against the pavement.
'Yep.' I said.
We watched the two women proceed up the street, making a fine circle to avoid an aggressive looking tramp sitting outside the Centra hassling people for coins.



Blogger morgor said...

i'd say even if you went up to them and said "that tramp is intimidating people" they'd say "there's nothing we can do".

10:50 a.m.  
Blogger Manuel said...

those statue people get right on my man boobs. I mean they really need tasered.....

10:52 a.m.  
Blogger gimme a minute said...

Hassling the belligerent might involve some effort.

Converse clad Wonderwallers are an easy job, allowing our hard-working Peace Guardians to quickly resume their pleasant Sunday stroll.

11:29 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Moving statues, the very worst kind of statues.
That's exactly it Morgor and Gimmie. Skinny kid warbling away or drunken reprobate giving all and sundry lip. Gee which one is in more need to a cop talking too, I wonder.
I'm going to garden, it's 17 degrees. I cannot understand this weather but I'll be damned if I'm going to waste it. Plus I had a sports massage at 8:30 this morning and I'm buggered if I'm going to waste feeling this limber sitting around at my desk.

11:44 a.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

Power is wasted on the guards.

Btw, the term 'Ban Garda' no longer exists on account of it being sexist, but mostly because 'fear' Garda has too many justifiable translingual connotations.

1:09 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dublin is a tiphead why should we be suprised at this? Ban guards should be constrained to desk duties and "makin the tay" back at the staion.

1:36 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So what's the deal? Is it just impossible to prosecute beggars? There must be some reason (not a good one, I'd say, but a reason nonetheless) that they avoid them like the plague?

1:49 p.m.  
Blogger Andraste said...

I'd say anyone with a puppet needs working on more than some poor kid who just learned is fourth guitar chord. Puppets...christ.

2:27 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I think you can move beggers on, not sure if any one bother to prosecute them.
Wot!? Not 'Ban ' no more? Bah, stupid times, always moving on.
Agreed too, Puppeteers have no place on public streets, nor clowns.
There was a terrific looper outside the Green dancing and pointing at his own reflection in the window. I would have cheerfully given him money if he'd wanted it. That level of 'teh crazy' is most entertaining.

I am cleaning out a shed and the spiders in there are as bug as my hand and don't appear to be alarmed by me as much as I am of them.

2:35 p.m.  
Blogger Andraste said...

Ugh - cleaned out our garage yesterday, getting it ready for winter - spiders in there I wouldn't tangle with for all the beer in Boston.

3:36 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Frightening isn't it? We've got these big fuckers that spin massive webs in the eaves and drop down on single threads to have a look at what's going on. I've bolted twice and went hiawatha with a sweeping brush once. It's exhausting trying to move shit and watch those fuckers at the same time.

4:09 p.m.  
Blogger Medbh said...

I felt guilty the other day for walking by a busker in the subway without tipping. I never, ever do , but this was an old man playing an instrument from Chinese opera that was so beautiful I almost cried.

4:13 p.m.  
Anonymous problemchildbride said...

Fear Garda - ha!

They were probably afraid McSavage was going to be unfunny at them. The Unfunny can be tough to deal with. Even the most equable law enforcement officer might be sorely tempted to insert his truncheon up the unfunniest of the perp's nostrils. The Street Unfunny are just asking for a case of police brutality. The bobby on the beat does well to just keep the head down and walk on by.

4:19 p.m.  
Blogger PI said...

In spider land I wear a shower cap in case any of the ------- decide to drop in my hair. EEEEugh!

4:29 p.m.  
Blogger Medbh said...

FMC, did you watch the clip Michael K had for the Hot Slut of the Day? It's awesome.

4:36 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

FMC...don't wish to unduly alarm you, but there are spiders in Dublin called "false widows"...newly arrived in the country...3-4 years, but they are a little bigger than your average housepider, but give a nasty bite..not dangerous usually, but painful, like a wasp.

Look em up on the www!

4:39 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Medbh, I haven't I'll go look.
False Widow Spiders??? Ye-ack.
I moved a wood pile today and I swear to you, the things that crawled/scuttled out of that thing. I'm still scratching. I do like the shower cap idea though, and a white suit the CSI crowd wear.
Sam, McSavage is so unbearably unfunny he's been bopped on the nose more than once by irate passers-by.

5:57 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Medbh! Who was that fabulous creature!!? What is True Blood and where on this EARTH can I find me some more of it?

7:22 p.m.  
Blogger Medbh said...

FMC, I am loving Lafayette and Tara on "Trueblood." There was also this funny bit about humans drinking vampire blood for either a radical viagra effect or similar to dropping shrooms. It's the new HBO series from Alan Ball (he of the Six Feet Under Fame) based on a graphic novel series about a young woman who can read people's thoughts and falls in love with a vampire. It has this civil rights sub-plot where vampires want to live peacefully with humans.

11:44 p.m.  
Blogger Andraste said...

Medbh - I caught an episode of that. Pretty damn interesting. If I could manage to get a TV show on my schedule, that'd be a shitload of fun. Unfortunately, it's a few years past my vampire phase. Yes, I had one.

Not proud.

1:38 a.m.  
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