Quantum of Solace?
If there is a plot to the new Bond film Quantum of Solace I couldn't find it. Nearly two hours of watching Duck Face Potato Head kill maim and generally shooboogie his way around the world on the Queen's dime and nary a plot. What happened to the dude from the boot of the car in the opening sequence? What happened to the general? The other one I mean not the cardboard cut out nasty from boo-leev-eee-a. Why did that dude who was in Hanibbal go to Boo-leev-eee-a? Why did he die? Who trussed him up and stuck him in Bond's car? It was ludicrous. And dull. Even the action scenes. They're over edited, Bourne wannabes. But where I believe Jason Bourne could crack my skull open in a Krav Magna minute, Duck Face Potato Head renders me mirthful. And also where are all the cool villains? An environmentalist? really? REALLY? Surely that's like being attacked by a houseplant. Bah.
Look, Bond is Bond, he's supposed to be a secret agent, yet everyone knows him, he's a sot and an randy Roger, but he's also supposed to be debonaire and fucking likable. This Bourne light Duck Face Potato Head is NOT likable, nor is he debonair. He's just a Duck Face Potato Head in a suit with a bigger budget and none of the class.
Also, because the night was black tie we were dolled up and went to an after party. It was fine, but for fuck's sake, when did young people get so entitled? I might be showing my age a little here, but it struck me last night how many fake nailed fake haired fake smiled people were rude, more than a little obnoxious and absolutely miserable.
I looked over the balcony of my black tie do at the 'norms' dancing below at one point. Country Gay joined me.
'At least they look like they're having fun' He said somewhat wistfully. Then we went off with ourselves and drank more free champagne (yeah, our lives are so hard).
The highlight though was the girl who tried to get the Paramour tossed out on his ear because he had the temerity to say 'Oi! There's a queue here, and I'm in it' when she skipped past him with a friend to enter a toilet cubicle that had just become available.
'I'm getting the manager you can't talk to me like that.' She said, demanding the bouncer who was in the hall go get the manager.
'Are you all just going to stand here?' The paramour asked of the shuffling line.
One Hooray Henry said,'Man it's not worth it, it's her gig.'
'I don't give a shit what it is.' My beloved informed the line. 'She can queue up like the rest of us.'
Faced with a glowering man beast who wasn't backing down the girl grabbed her friend and flounced off.'I'm getting the manager and having you thrown out!' She yelled.
'Grow the fuck up.' The paramour replied.
Fortunately I managed to calm him down with a bottle of free champagne. In fact it appears free champagne can quell most ills.
It does however give you a frightful hangover the next day. Coffee anyone?