Monday, March 02, 2009

ROCK STAR IN COCAINE SHOCKER!



Irish version of Rock God-->


Stop the presses! Get the smelling salts out! Irish rock God, lead singer of Boyzone, husband, father, and leather pant wearer, Ronan Keating, has shockingly revealed he has NEVER been offered cocaine in almost 15 years of being an Irish Rawk Star. The 'Life is a RollerCoaster' singer expressed bemusement. This reader expressed bemusement. Puddy expressed bemusement.
Next week, Shane McGowen SHOCKINGLY reveals he doesn't like go to the dentist much and Enya, will she or won't she wear white on her next albumn cover? Who can say, all I know is I can hardly STAND waiting to find out.

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31 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ronan Keating is a talentless little cunt, who should still be flipping burgers in McDonalds.

Of course he's been offered cocaine AND sex and whatever else can be offered.The question is, does anyone really give a fuck?

2:54 p.m.  
Blogger Kim Ayres said...

I hear tell that Elvis is STILL dead!

3:01 p.m.  
Blogger Medbh said...

Ew.
Is he wanking it?

3:02 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Dunno Medbh, I think he's just warming his cockles.
Kim, I know folks who would disagree with that LINE of thinking.

Monkey, do tell!

3:12 p.m.  
Anonymous sheepworrier said...

It's not to be sniffed at...

3:22 p.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

These sorts of interviews are usually followed some months later with a headline along the lines of "STAR IN COKE ORGY WITH UNDERPANTS MODEL"


Just a wii sniff to shorten the day.

3:47 p.m.  
Anonymous problemchildbride said...

Why hasn't he got any clothes on? It's March for Chrissakes.

5:01 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Wouldn't turn your nose up eh Sheepie?

Conan, 'underpants' model? What are you suggesting??

Sam, I doubt he even feels the cold, what with his rawk star status, rawk stars are not mortal you know.

6:02 p.m.  
Blogger Manuel said...

made me chortle out loud.......

11:35 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

It's the pint, right?

9:23 a.m.  
Blogger Sweary said...

I wouldn't give him any of my coke either. Dirty little fucker can source his own.

10:09 a.m.  
Anonymous Babs said...

Yack, why doesn't he have clothes on.
Rock God - hahahahahahahahahhaahahhaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
He gives me the creeps big time! Even I've been offered coke before! :)

12:09 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I don't mind his so much, really. Gately though, oh no. He's squicks my wire big time, especially naked.

1:41 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

some one should shoot that little tallentless cunt ronan keating ,
they should dig up his fucking mother and kick the fuck out of here for giving birth to a cunt like him everyone hates the twat,
keep him of tv forever ,
maybe if someone threatened to shoot the little fucker on stage he would stay away,
stay in fucking ireland with all the usless irish wanker we dont want you over here you bastard

3:39 p.m.  
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