Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Romance, writ large!

Okay, it is early-for me. I am sitting here in my kimono, I look like I always look in the morning, like I was dragged through a hedge. I have a cup of steaming coffee to my right and I am sniffing softly to myself.
But these are tears of sheer delight. (I like crying, especially when very happy, don't ask)
Let me explain.
8:am- the doorbell went. I ignore it.
8:01am -it goes again, much louder and longer this time.
Grumpily I arise and shuffle, mussy headed, to the hall. I pick up the intercom.
'Good morning to you too.'
'What? Who is this?'
'It's me.'
Oh shit, the Paramour. I buzz him in and race to the mirror.
Eek! It is worse than I expected. Hair wild, face, puffy and covered in bits of green thither and yon from the face pack I used last night. I look a fright. I look deranged.
I try to shape my hair, ridiculous, it refuses to obey. Shit, I haven't even time to brush my teeth-
I hear a soft tap on the door.
Damn it.
I sigh, pull my shoulders up and answer it.
'Good morning.' he says cheerily. He kisses me on the top of my head.
'Hello, what are you doing here-this early?' I open the door wider.
He shakes his head. 'I'm not staying, I just stopped by to drop this off.'
He hands me a bag. I take it and blink. I look at him again, he is smiling.
'What is it?'
'You'll see.'
He kisses me again, on the lips this time and trots off down the stairs.
I close the door and go into my sitting room. I plonk down on the sofa and open the bag. I take out a parcel wapped in glittery red paper. I know at once that he didn't wrap it, this was done professionally. I have seen the paramour wrap.
I undo the layers of paper and remove a black box. it's light, It's flat, sort of CD sized.
I open it.
Inside, gleaming, a brand spanking new iPod Nano. It is slim, it is light, it is half the size of my old one, there is even a cool leather cover.
I am speechless.

I call him. 'You are the sweetest person I know, thank you so much. I absolutely love it.'
'You're welcome, I know how much you missed your old one.'

So folks. I am bubbling this morning, I am bubbling and completely and utterly blown away be this act of thoughtfulness. It makes me feel all gooey inside.
Hence the snuffling.
Hence the post title.
Sunshine and lollipops indeed. This is right up there for me.
What's the most romantic thing anyone one has ever done for you?


Blogger Dr Maroon said...

Well I for one do not like the sound of this fellow.
Why couldn't he have just put it through the letterbox?
The i-pod I mean.
I wouldn't use it till it's been scanned by experts. It could have subliminal messages on it. Gooey indeed.
I'll have to sack somebody now.

9:39 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Oh Docklington, you know I'll always have a special smoochiness reserved just for you.

9:53 a.m.  
Blogger SheBah said...

Careful, FMC, he's softening you up for something - is he in advertising?

9:54 a.m.  
Blogger the anti-barney said...

Are we all invited to the wedding?

9:57 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

SB, no advertising, everyone I know in advertising is a monster. Male and female alike.
Barney, haah! But if there is a wedding you can sit on my side of the church. Coz we family.
Hey, no one has answered my question, what is the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for you? I want to know, I want everyone to feel yummy today.

10:37 a.m.  
Blogger Twenty Major said...

I'll have to sack somebody now.

Will it be Polly Prissypants or Clyde Frog? That is the question.

11:17 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Good morning Twenty, and what pray, has been the most romantic thing abyone has done for you?

11:23 a.m.  
Blogger Twenty Major said...

That is a very good question and certainly not one that I am prepared to answer. Good day you, ma'am.

11:24 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Ah come on!

11:27 a.m.  
Blogger Twenty Major said...

I said 'Good day!'

11:29 a.m.  
Blogger the anti-barney said...

Nothing faintly romantic ever happened to him,no wonder he is so bitter and twisted.

12:15 p.m.  
Blogger SheBah said...

My Italian EX-fiance bought me my first car, and that seemed very romantic at the time. I later discovered he was a serial cheater. Nowadays, my ideal romantic gesture is for my lust interest to cook dinner when I am knackered, or unexpected small thoughtful gestures like bringing me neurofen and a glass water when I have a cold, or big hugs at odd moments.

3:58 p.m.  
Blogger SheBah said...

...oh, and a guy wrote a very soppy poem for me when I was a teenager.....I still have it.

4:00 p.m.  
Blogger KnackeredKaz said...

A guy once sent me a Valentine's card with a verse from a Meatloaf song on it....I thought that was romantic until I actually READ the verse and realised it was "Like a Bat out of hell, you'll be gone when the morning comes"...He swore he meant to write the words to "Real Dead Ringer for Love"

Ah, my youth!

4:19 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

SB you're right, There is nothing like a man who will take care of you when you are ill and feeling wretched But I am hugely impressed with the car purchase, not so much with the cheating.
Knackeredkaz- at least it wasn't 'I would do anything for love, but I won't do that...'Know whaddamean, huh huh? Huh, do ya?

5:03 p.m.  
Blogger finn said...

ooh, Paramour's points are off the board today!! are you sure this wasn't a dream?

what will you put on your nano first?

and as for romance ... well, my fiance proposed to me a couple hours after he'd picked me up from the hospital, when i was still floating on a cloud of percoset, utterly fascinated with my cuticles.

i said yes. or, so he tells me.

5:10 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Clever, clever man, ask her when she's off her face. I like his style.
The first thing I put on the iPod was was the Royksopp album- The Understanding, followed by Leftfield's Leftism.

5:45 p.m.  
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