Wednesday, September 06, 2006

What the galloping gonads? Insomnia!

Insomnia, I"m totally against it!
I"m very tired, grouchy and a little bit fuddled right now, and I'm fairly certain I look alarmingly like Worzel Gummidge.
Last night due to a combination of not enough booze and no sleeping tablets I suffered terribly with a slap in the belly load of bloomin' insomnia. Now I know I am not alone in this, I know lots of you have it. I know some some of you cope very well with it, or at least are decent enought to struggle on in a cheery sort of way. But not this fatcat. I hate insomnia and I hate it so much I am going to moan about it with gusto.
First of all it is a tricksy little fucker isn't it? Creeping up on a gal, like some kind of would be mugger. There I was, tired eyes, the bigger of the cats snoring gently away on the pillow next to me. I put my book down, turned off the lights sighed, got comfy and the BAM! It was like someone shot me in the arm with a whack job load of contrary-isms.

Suddenly the duvet was too heavy, the mattress uncomfortable, were my eyes open or closed? Ergh, did that pillow just poke me in the neck, my shoulder hurts, I don't like sleeping on my back, ouch, now I don't like sleeping on my sleepy side, my other shoulder was in the way, the cat's snores were reaching the cresendo jets make when they take off... was that a shaft of light? Was it? Was it? Wait a minute, how come I can hear those cars? I never usually notice them. Shit, are my eyes open? I hope I didn't get Etheline in the shit with my mother, I wonder will I get that job next week? I'm so behind on my projects, stupid Memnoch, oh why does the Paramour keep talking about that house like I"m suddenly going to fall in love with it, It looks even worse in the rain, why don't I fall in love with it, maybe I'm afraid of commitment, no, that's silly, is it though, maybe it runs in the family, look at Etheline, eeeeek, no you're being stupid, I really must get that mole on my back looked at, I"m fairly certain it has changed shape and that's a sign isn't it? Oh Jesus I'm sounding like my mother, I will I will, next week, had enough doctors for this week, Stupid Memnoch, Jesus, I never noticed how loud the bigger of the cats snores, I wonder is that normal. (I poke him) He huffs and starts purring. Jesus now that is loud, ow, don't knead. Pool old Puddy, maybe I should let her sleep in here instead, no, she always wants to get up in the middle of the night, still, poor Puddy, God I'm so far behind in my work, I'll never catch up, no stop saying that, of course you will, you just need to put more hours in, stop faffing about and going places and reading blogs, do a good five hours in the morning...what time is it? Sheeeet, it twenty to fucking three! Go asleep! Maybe I should take a sleeping tablet, at least I'd get some sleep then, no wait, that cross doctor told me to stop taking them, well, that's all very good, but he's not lying here with a mountain of work on tomorrow, now is he? Shit. I-ten past three? How the fuck did that happen? Go asleep, go asleep go asleep. Oh Christ I"ll never do it. My eyes are definitely open. That's it I'm getting up. Everyone says that's what you should do...
So I got up all right, got up took a sleeping tablet and was asleep half an hour later, blissfully unaware of any sounds or thoughts.
I don't care what a cranky doctor says, Sleeping tablets=sleep. And that's good enough reason to take them for me. The very last thing I need is to meet my worried subconsciousness- at any hour. And If I have to be a pill-popping booze hound to beat its sorry arse so be it.
Insomnia, I'm against it!
(by the by, if anyone knows how to actually tackle it without slithering into a drug induced coma, I'd like to hear it)


Blogger Dr Maroon said...

FMC, I have brought twenty major and Andraste and Barney with me to sing you a lullaby. It’s the one from Mary Poppins.

OK guys after three, anda one two three..

Stay awake, don't rest your head
Don't lie down upon your bed
While the moon drifts in the skies
Stay awake, don't close your

Though the world is fast asleep
Though your pillow's soft and deep
You're not sleepy as you seem
Stay awake, don't nod and dream
Stay awake, don't nod and dream

Beautiful. The harmony, delightful. I’ll have to podcast that. Classic.

11:51 a.m.  
Blogger finn said...

doc, the point is to send her to sleep, not scare the pants off her.

cat, have you tried getting up and doing something like reading -- or, if your mind's truly awhirl, actually tackling that mound of work? if the body doesn't want to sleep, it won't, so you might as well not fight it is my motto. and if the body wants ice cream at 3am, well who am i to quibble?

11:59 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

er thank you doccy, that wan't in the least bit frightening or disturbing. Do record it and I can play it for my nieces and nephew, I'm sure they'll just love it too.
Finn, I don't want to be awake, that's the problem, I was always a poor sleeper until I discovered Dormidina 25, and over the counter sleeping tablet that I buy by the shed load every time I'm in Barcelona. And I sleep perfectly soundly. But now it appears I shouldn't be taking a sleeping tablet every night after all, so what shall I do instead? I rather like sleeping at night, and if I don't, I end up tired and napping during the day and getting forgetful and grouchy. What's a gal to do?

12:48 p.m.  
Blogger Springfield said...

fmc, i had the same thing for the longest time.... what's worked for me is to get up at the same time, every god damn day. but let your bedtime change. if you stay up late one night, you'll automatically go to bed earlier the next night.

also, i had to stop reading in bed... i only crawl into bed when it's time for sleep... or, er... other bedtime activities.

1:35 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Springfield, I've been trying to do this getting up earlier thingie this week and last week, although that wasn't really through choice. I'm naturally a half nine-ish sort of person, and have always been a bit of a night owl since I was a kid. That's why it is so strange to be tickled with insomnia now, like yesterday I rolled out of my leaba at ten to eight (unheard of normally) and yet there I was last night tossing and turning and poking cats. Really, is taking a sleeping tablet every night so bad? I mean it's so easy, take one about forty minutes before bed, retire to bed, read two chapters of book, fall into deep dreamingly busy sleep, awake bright eyed and bushy tailed-after coffee-in morning. Voila. And yet that doctor, I mean he really did frown at me and do that thing where thye try to make you listen to reason and sense, and dammit it, some of it must have seeped through.
Is there such a thing as being overtired? Or is that just something parents say to excuse kids having hissy fits??

2:13 p.m.  
Blogger KnackeredKaz said...

I don't know anything about sleeping tablets now, but it would seem to me that you shouldn't need one EVERY night, only on odd occassions when it really is difficult to sleep?

On the other hand I don't have insomnia either and I know it can be why not invest in those herbal sleeping tablets? Might be better for the system than prescription ones?

There's loads of brand names on the market, can't think of one right now, but they contain valerian (sp), a plant, which is bloody brilliant! I have to say, I took them last year while I was waiting for my surgery and quite sick and they worked a treat. Didn't need them after that cos I got better and went back to my good sleeping ways. But they're great and non addictive and a natural calmer rather than a chemical. You could ask your pharmacist about them

Whaddaya think?

3:17 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Yersh, but the thing is Mizz Kaz, that having spent the past say, oh, year dabbling and injesting 'real' sleeping tablets, I find the herbal ones don't do nowt at all. But I shall give it a whirl, I'll buy a packet of Nitol and see how it goes. Cheers lovie.

5:16 p.m.  
Blogger finn said...

do you have Celestial Seasoning's Sleepytime Extra herbal tea? (the extra = valerian.) that works pretty well for me. it's got a cute bear on the box too.

5:22 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Nope, but I"ll have a look out for it.

5:50 p.m.  
Blogger Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

I've taken that tea too and it worked pretty well but some of these herbal things should only be taken advisedly. I don't know if you take any other medications at all but the herbs can bugger them up, so they say.

I've tried all sorts for insomnia and now have a running prescription for Ambien CR which works most of the time. It releases in two stages so if you have trouble staying asleep it takes care of that too. I know the point is to get off the pills but maybe your doctor could prescribe something and then wean you off slowly, 'cos it's not easy to adjust after taking something for so long. Jeezo, what was that stuff that you can only get it in Barcelona?

What works for my girls, who have course no stress, no jobs, no worrying moles and things to keep them up, is a bath. I bath them every night for that reason, not because they really need one for cleanliness. Something about the change in temperatures and the cozy warm pyjamas knocks them out and if I don't do it, they can be up and fretful for hours. Night-time baths have occasionally worked for me too, but not hot milk or cocoa or any of that cos then I just have to get up to pee.

You already do loads of exercise so you're covered there. I'm sorry, cat, the best i can come up with is the weaning thing. And maybe the tea and valerian thing - that stuff really works but I'm leery of herbs and stuff cos of their tendency to mess with anything else you might be taking.

A wee spot of rum as a nightcap never hurt anybody though!

8:16 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Thank you sweetie, I shall give all a try, especially the bath since I rather love them anyhoo. Just back from a bar-b-cue, probably the last of the year, off now to read the papers, have a glass of wine and a bit of how's yer father, but no sleeping tablets. Will keep y'all informed. After last night's tossing and a turning I should be snoozing like a fox in no time.

10:03 p.m.  
Blogger Monstee said...

OK FMC. Me happen to know little bit bout sleep problems and sleep aids. Active ingredient in Dormidina 25 am Doxylamine Succinate and it am very good treatment for insomnia. Keyword that am TREATMENT! It am not meant to be used every night all time. Doxylamine Succinate, like many Psychotropics should not be used more than 2 or three weeks without doctor consent. If you do, you can build up dependency and not even know it. Just as you every day street junky may need fix of heroin just to keep from feeling sick, you insomnia may actually be caused or at least exacerbated by you over use of Dormidina 25. Or to put it another way, you body may have just forgotten how to go to sleep on its own and expects you to take them pills at night. Now this may seem like simple self perpetuating problem that can be solved by continue use of pills, but in long run it put terrible stress and strain on you body. Just like being overweight make it harder to exist normally and carry with it certain health problems, constantly taking sleeping pills have they own set of health hazards.

Now believe me, me know horror of prolonged insomnia. Me normally sleep very little anyway, but for me worst was when me went for like two weeks and only got about maybe ten minuets of sleep every 24 hours. (Cat naps.) Me went to doctor for sleeping pills and instead he put me on antidepressant stimulants. Me take them in morning and have REALLY good up type day and at bedtime... Well, crash am just to mild of word for it. Me was out like flicking of light switch. For you, you body may be trying to fight constant downs you putting into it by keeping you up. You may need some ups so you body try to give you some downs naturally. Me think you should look into this when you think you can stomach doctors again.

As for non-drug remedies, me am one of get up and do people. If me not fall asleep in 30 minuets, me get up and DO something for 15 minuets. Key am to DO something. Clean, sort, read (not in bed, get up), play card game on computer... Whatever, but DO something. Then go back to bed and repeat as needed. Before me started doing this me would toss and turn in bed for half night. Now, me seldom go more than 3 times getting up.

Other highly recommended relaxation techniques am meditation and sex (Note: this does not necessarily need to be kind of sex that involves other people.)

Hope this helps!


9:10 a.m.  
Blogger John Mc said...


I feel for ya. I’m in London for work, and I spent the weekend in The Motherland upon arrival. Between the 10 hours flying and the time change, and some drinks with the brothers, I got a total of 12 hours sleep over the weekend. I had complete insomnia every night. I would fall asleep immediately but wake around 2 and end up getting out of bed at first light not having slept since. Having small kids you get used to working on little sleep, but this was beyond the pale altogether.
I arrived in London on Monday a total wreck - 3 hours sleep the night before. I have never taken sleeping tablets, but my dear old mum gave me some in case of dire need. A half one on Monday night knocked me out stone cold for 10 hours! I feel myself again.
I used to be a mild insomniac, when I was younger and could handle it. Laying of caffeine later in the day and working out mid afternoon really helped. Apparently working out in the evening can cause insomnia. Also having a regular routine seems to work. Insomnia rears its ugly head when I get out of my routine.

9:41 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Eek John, sounds rough, how on Earth did you function at all?
Monstee my purple fuzzbuddy of lurve, that made perfect sense, and is almost word for word what the cross doctor said to me in the 'hostible'.
Alrighty then, I shall brave the new world, I shall strike foth and enter a new realm of sleeplessness. I shall forgo the delights of Dormidina 25, phooey be upon it.
Tonight I will head for bed a wait, you know what I mean, sin drugs, sin alcohol, sin todo...
lawks, this might be scary, but avast!

9:54 a.m.  
Blogger Monstee said...

"...almost word for word what the cross doctor said to me in the 'hostible'."

You cross doctor speak monsteespeak?!?!
Was you 'hostible' in cave?

Sounds like you was in very good paws.

10:58 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I said 'almost'. And he didn't look as cute as you neither. Actually, if every lecture was given in Monstee speak the whole world would be a much sunnier place.

11:58 a.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have a wank, if that doen't work, have another wank.

3:45 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...


5:07 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If insomnia is wreaking havoc in your life and in spite of your consistent efforts you are unable to sleep at night, you should soon approach a doctor. After a thorough examination, your physician may prescribe sleep inducing medicines such as ambien or sonata. However these medicines should never be taken without a proper prescription from a doctor as they tend to yield side-effects which at times can be serious.

1:23 p.m.  
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9:09 a.m.  
Anonymous Natural Health Articles said...

There are many ways to cure insomnia, but have you tried brainwave entrainment? It's effective to stop it. Try it. You can find lots of free audios out there.

10:04 a.m.  
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