Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Resistance is...well, boderline futile.

This is a total tease, a tease of epic proportions. I am an Apple whore, I love their stuff, I love my iPod, my Dapple, (desk Apple of big screen size) our old Lapple, (ibook or lap Apple )all manner of Apple things in fact, love them. Love the design, love the style, love the way they work with no hassle and even computer idiots like me can operate them.
I love Apple products.
But this is taking things to bloomin' far! I am AGAINST mobile phones. I would go as far as to say I hate them. I hate that people on buses use them to say they are two seconds away from their destination. I hate that people use them in lifts. I hate catchy ring tones. I hate people texting while they are talking to you.
I just don't like being in contact ALL THE BLOODY TIME!
So when I saw the following on this fine sunny morning, it set off all manner of twitches and bleeps in my wracked body.
What is a fat cat to do?



Blogger Twenty Major said...

I want one.

10:31 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

It's freaking awesome is it not? I'm completely torn.

11:11 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Can you imagine what Scar would say?

11:11 a.m.  
Anonymous Shebah said...

Love it. So coooool. I would need an op. to separate me from my mobys. I have two, one work, one personal. My personal one has the standard Nokia ring tone, but my work one has a really cool Chinese tune as ring tone - very Zen. Go on, FMC, get one, you know you want to! And they take photos too!

11:21 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

NOOOOOOO must resist. Damn you beautiful sleek papple! Damn you to hell!

11:24 a.m.  
Blogger Twenty Major said...

Can you imagine how awesome the Rockford Files theme tune would sound on it?

And wouldn't it be a Phapple?

11:32 a.m.  
Blogger Twenty Major said...

Scar - heh. He'd die.

11:32 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

It could be a Mapple now that I think about it. Yep Mapple.

11:36 a.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

Ah, me old AppleClassic's in the shed... in its original box. It's 40k memory in sleep mode. It was horridly expensive. Overpriced like all apple products. Now, since M. le Paramour's getting a wii, you want to reassert style over substance and buy another Apple product. Steve Jobs must love you, bigtime. Bet you've ordered one, haven't you? Go on, admit it! Mapple schmapple!

11:54 a.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

Ok, go on, how did it go on the 10k?

11:56 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I haven't ordered a thing, I swear it!
The 10k went well, 'cept for the huge puddle I plunged into a the start which meant I ran the whole race with a very wet sock. And it was yet another struggle to get out of the pack, but I suppose that's to be expected considering the huge numbers that showed up. I didn't clear it until the RDS.
I think Conan old pal old buddy, I must accept I am not a speedy runner. But I finished strongly, picking up speed in the last 2k, so it all bodes well for my marathon bid in October. (even though the thought of it give me the willies)

12:00 p.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

Effin' puddle! Effin' pack! Well done for finishing strong, as you say it bodes well for the longer distance. Er, now Missus, what was your eh, finishing, you know, time?

12:26 p.m.  
Blogger The Swearing Lady said...

Does it come with the annoying voiceover? Calamari, my arse.

I made sure to put a comma after calamari in case you thought it was a request.

1:18 p.m.  
Anonymous Shebah said...

FMC, if you ae crazy enough to want a bit more practice, the following was posted on a local site this morning.

West London based charity, Epilepsy Research UK, still has some guaranteed entries available for the British 10K London Run in central London on Sunday 1st July. If you'd like to join the festive crowds of the London 10K, email shona@eruk.org.uk or call Shona on 8995 4781 (day) for further details. Thanks!

1:55 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

In a light batter? Disturbing. More disturbing than that is the fact that you said not to confuse myself and to notice the comma, which I did. You should learn to drive though, in case of emergency.
No idea yet Conan, waiting for them to go up.
Shebah, I"ll have a look at it but I doubt I'll be able to get over for it.

2:13 p.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

So you didn't wear a watch, or a wapple...if such a thing exists!?

2:25 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I did, but it's not terribly accurate. We run across these metalic strips as we left and that activated my timing chip which clocks my race time. By my watch reckoning I went at about 1 hour eight minutes, but I could be completely wrong about that so I'll have to wait and see.

2:38 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Bah! One minute slower than last time. 71 mins. Stupid start. Stupid stopping to tie laces and remove knee strapping, stupid wet sock, stupid narrow streets. Stupid not being faster than the average sloth.
Oh well, next time. Onwards!

2:46 p.m.  
Blogger Conan Drumm said...

Well done, those mini-marathongs must be wicked uncomfortable so to last 71mins in one is quite a feat.

3:01 p.m.  
Blogger finn said...

well, i believe. i'm powerless over that kind of subliminal marketing.

and, you don't have to use it as a phone.

well done on the 10K!

3:10 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

It's a sign! it's a sign!

3:13 p.m.  
Blogger finn said...

here's another sign (esp compelling for those of us who must resort to wireless for net access).

7:45 p.m.  
Blogger Sassy Sundry said...

Oh, I really, really want one of those things. They are just so nifty.

7:50 p.m.  
Blogger Face said...

hmm. Looks like you could end up calling alot of seafood restaurants and spending ALOT of money surfing the web accidentally if you were one of those who forget to lock their phones before popping them in your bag, as I am.
I have an old Nokia brick mobile covered in electrical tape to hold the battery in the back, which all the 17 year olds I know say looks like a cordless house phone. To which I say 'Its retro chic, darling. Those newfangled things are horrible, why would you?' All I want a phone for is to send the odd important text message. And NOT while I'm in the middle of talking to someone, how rude.

12:18 a.m.  
Anonymous Captain Fatty said...

What does narp mean?

1:26 a.m.  
Blogger Manuel said...

I was looking at the same the other day. Lmm came into the room to find me hunched over the monitor making ooh and ahh noises. I think she would have been more relieved to find me watching porn....

2:28 a.m.  
Blogger finn said...

powerless. godfuxkimgdammot. (still figuring out tje keybd.)(

4:40 a.m.  
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