Thursday, January 03, 2008

Ghastly sort of morning should segue to pleasant evening

Brrrr, ain't it chilly? Winter seems to have arrived. Snow in London, gale force wind in my back yard. The bigger of the cats and Marklar are off killing things/eating in neighbour's homes. Puddy appears to have taken ecstasy for she is tearing about the place like a lunatic (she has also worked out that if she opens a press door in the corner of the kitchen, she can snake along to the cat food press, three doors away, and help herself. She is rotund but clever that one) I have managed to crash my computer not once but indeed twice. I STILL didn't manage to get up before eight. but I did manage one miraculous thing.
Country Gay, my good friend and confidant, is coming out for his VERY first run tonight.
Oh I'm so proud of him.
He's been talking for some time about wanting to do a run. He came up to the Phoenix Park with me last year to collect my bib and pack for the Bupa Great Run and found that he liked the atmosphere.
'I might do this with you next year ' quoth he, forgetting on that sunny warm day that I am inclined to remember things like that.
So a few weeks before Christmas I reminded him of what he said, and he hummed and hawed me.
'But don't you want to do it?' I bothered him with.
'I do darling' he said, unconvincingly.
So I tried to arrange a training schedule but he works a lot and then it slithered into Christmas and the lo, it was a New Year.
But last night-as I went out rather painfully for my first run of the new year- I swung by his lovely home half way through my loop.
Silly man opened the door without checking through the keyhole first.

'Come out with me tomorrow night, I PROMISE I won't do anything stupid with you, I won't make you run too far or too fast, we'll take as many breaks as you want or need, what say you!?' I flapped pinkly at him. 'You've got to do some training for the race in April Darling, might as well start now.'
'But,' he said clutching his cigarettes to his chest in terror, probably kicking himself internally for opening the door-'I won't have the lung capacity to run.'
'Darling I PROMISE I won't half kill you.'
'Er, well, okay then.' he said.
Huzzah! Huzzah!
Really, I'm only going to do a very gentle 5k with him, nothing heavy,I have the perfect route mapped out already. I'll run to his house and then run home after so I get a good old trundle out it it, but I remember well my first 5k and so I won't be unaware of any struggle he might have, plus I'll make sure he warms up properly first.
Oh I'm so pleased about this, I don't even know why. Just that I do think CG has the capacity to be a good runner, he can dance all night you know.
Eeeeee, I hope he enjoys it. This must be how drug peddlers feel when they make a sale.



Anonymous sheepworrier said...

Hmm, its hard to tell if you're being nice or evil... making a smoker run like that - thats why god made taxis!

11:57 a.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I believe he is considering giving up smoking too, so perhaps this will be more incentive.
I never say anything to him about smoking, not my place and it's his decision, but I'd totally support him 100% if he did quit.

12:05 p.m.  
Blogger finn said...

good on yah FMC.

did you consider run/walk intervals? might make for an easier transition.

good luck!

12:18 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

That's precisely what I'll be doing, walk for a few minutes, jog for a few minutes, and so on. I'm not going to do anything that might cause him an injury or put him off going out a second time.

12:42 p.m.  
Blogger Medbh said...

You're a good friend to him, FMC. You know I think that many people don't take up exercise because they're afraid.
Afraid of looking foolish in public or that they won't do it right or something. Having a friend show you builds confidence and makes it more likely that the practice/habit will stick.

2:53 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

He is a wee bit nervous to be sure. CG is wiry yet strong and hasn't an ounce of extra fat on him, so I think he'd probably make a good runner if he put his mind to it.
But it can be intimidating to start anything new. Easier when you've got encouragement. Unless you're like my mother, I offered to get her gym membership years ago and her reply was that she'd need to lose weight BEFORE she went near a gym. You can't argue with that logic.

3:15 p.m.  
Anonymous Sam, Problemchildbride said...

You filthy health-pushing scum! It all starts with "just a little run after work - look I'll give you the first one free" and before you know it Country Gay will be craving just one more run when all his body and soul is telling him Eastenders is on and look the kettle's just boiled.

That's how these insidious personal trainers get their claws into people.

I'm going to the gym with my shiny new membership on Saturday. I'm looking forward, but and yet at the same time, not at all.

3:41 p.m.  
Anonymous stipes said...

make sure Country Gay leaves those fags at home. 20 mins walk/jog will be more than enough for him, otherwise you may never see him again, AND your off the Christmas card list

3:54 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Yes, my insidious plan to healthify poor old CG is just a mere stepping stone to world domination. If only I could work out my new gusty stopper laser gun (GSLG ®) I firmly need to zap myself with it to get back to pre-christmas fatcat mode.
Don't worry Sam, gym are not bad places, in fact they're rather good places, trick is to not only notice the glorious and the taut, but also the lumpy and determined, that's when you realise everyone is there for the same reason and you have no reason to feel awkward.
HEY! There are some snowflakes falling outside. one, two...there's another!

3:54 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Afternoon Stipes. I'm breaking it into a one minute walk/two min gentle jog, on a flat 5k easy non hilly loop around his neighbourhood. If there's any problem we'll walk, if he feels good we'll poodle along, either way it will be at whatever pace he's comfortable with. He's a pretty decent walker already so this won't half kill him.

4:02 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I actually just received a Happy New Year Card from the Great Run organisers a second ago, it must be a sign!
Anybody else taking part in April?

4:04 p.m.  
Anonymous stipes said...

If I can get this post Christmas lard ass off this chair I might consider it

4:23 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Oh I hear you...

4:26 p.m.  
Blogger PI said...

Well one thing's for sure: he'll either bless you - eventually - or curse you, sooner. Hope it's the former - it's lovely to be able to widen a friend's horizons. (And maybe narrow their bum at the same time.)

4:34 p.m.  
Anonymous nonny said...

I am skippedy hopping along, my li’l mofo bro bottled out so have to fly solo, that will be an achievement in itself for me. Only thing is I was sick over the Christmas and won’t be able to do much for a week or two, do you think I’ll have enough time, I’m getting mixed advise?

4:48 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Pat I believe there will be a little of both, but it will all now have to wait until Satdee NOT that he's chickening out or anything (he swears), but tonight's off.
Guess I'll be poodling along on my Sweeny todd. Golly, but it's so very cold.

Nonny, it's not until April 6th, you have loads of time to prepare. Especially since you're already a runner.

5:53 p.m.  
Anonymous nonny said...

are you donna be an elite runner like in the mini marathon and try do it in under 43 mins?

6:06 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

They have sections for differently timed runners, but there's no way I'd do it that fast, I'll just try come in under the hour. I'll probably aim for the 55-60 min section and not go all the way to the back like last year. It was REALLY hard to get our from behind the walkers.

6:13 p.m.  
Anonymous nonny said...

You know what, i'm gonna bore the ears of you now but I was thinking they say a beginner runner should do a mile in about 12ish mins ok, so if you were very stategic about it and said lets say do a mile in 8ish mins you could have the little sucker wrapped up in 50 mins. Not for the marathon now just for this little run. All very well in theory but you know if when your actually trainning you did your best to stick to it, ye know timming yourself by each mile as opposed to the whole 6.2 miles. Do you think it is possible or have I lost you and you think I am mental?

6:27 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I don't know, I suppose it's possible, depends on how speedy you are and your endurance level for keeping that speed up I imagine. I think-and don't hold me to it- that most good ten k runners start off fast, but not top speed, then they up it a gear from the 6-7k mark. But for the average-like me- poodler, starting off too fast is an absolute disaster and we drop off when our legs start to feel it.
I noticed it last year actually, lots of folk shot past me at the very start, and these were the same folk I caught and passed on the climb at the 8k mark.
They never made up the speed either.

But Nonny, I'm no expert, plus I train alone and have no guide as to what is good or not good for anyone else. It was just an observation I made last year.

6:40 p.m.  
Anonymous Primal Sneeze said...

@Sheepworrier (1st comment, way up there at the top, no higher, yeah that one) - If god made taxis why does he let the devil drive them?

Hey, FMC, I bet the next time Puddy goes running with you and Country Gay slinks into a kitchen press.

8:19 p.m.  
Blogger Medbh said...

I've been watching all the new folks at the gym with their little sheets to fill in. The middle aged women often look frightened, like everyone's turning their noses up at them. I thought about saying something positive or encouraging, but it might be taken the wrong way, so I don't.

9:04 p.m.  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Sometimes if I see a lady or gent dithering at a machine, I'll ask if they want any help. Most folk blush and then say, 'Oh no... but I was just wondering how this machine works' and then I show them. Or even something as simple as a smile and a hello makes going to the gym a much more pleasant experience for folk who might be nervous. I mean sheeet, we all started somewhere. Plus I find the really big dudes are extremely helpful when not in the middle of a set.
That was cold and I've to change litter trays now, yack.

Primal, almost to the man every taxi driver I met over the holidays was cheerful and polite, how odd is that?

9:19 p.m.  
Anonymous nonny said...

Yeah I run by myself mostly, don't do a lot of gym work but I do quite a lot of out door activities. As soon as I'm good to go I'll change gym's and spend a bit more time there. I read a couple of books like that Claire Kowalchek one and I believe there is a good Irish one about the place but can't remember what it was called. It is hard trying to decide on a particular approach. Like you mentioned I don't want to start fastish and make a cock of it, what is it they say, start slow and get slower or some such.

I hope you enjoyed your run tonight I am dying to be at it again!!

11:25 p.m.  
Blogger Dr. James McInerney said...

Sheepworrier, I have discovered that God made taxis so that taxi drivers could have somewhere to smoke. That's why God made taxis.

1:24 a.m.  

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